Mom: “What time are we leaving?”
Me: “7pm”
Mom: “What time are we leaving?”
Me: “7pm”
And, five minutes later, “What time are we leaving?”
At some point, it gets a lot more challenging not to have that tone creep into your voice. That tone that says, I have told you for the fourth time! Some days, a certain tone is definitely in my voice. A tone that says, are you kidding me?! Stop! I cannot do this.
Patience has never been my strongest trait. I would describe myself as a rather impatient person, one who reads books quickly to get to the end. So dementia has been a test, and one that I too often recognize that I am failing. I strive for patience and yet so often it feels impossible. And some days I hardly want to try.
On the good days though I reflect that I am building some patience muscles. Perhaps it will pay off one day!
Not quite the plan 
August 16, 2014 at 8:07 am
Plan to try: whenever you tell her something, immediately forget that you’ve told her (or pretend that is the case)
August 16, 2014 at 10:51 am
My morning conversation with my husband was identical to yours with your mom. And I am the most impatient person in the world, but the good news is that five minutes later he forgets that I got impatient. Your mother probably does too. So no need to feel guilty.
August 16, 2014 at 3:37 pm
Growing patience muscles: what a terrific way to look at it. Just think how you will have perfected that trait by the end of the disease journey.
August 18, 2014 at 1:10 pm
You are only human. You will make mistakes. Forgive yourself.
August 19, 2014 at 10:19 am
Know that feeling! 😦 It is like water torture sometimes…
August 20, 2014 at 12:19 pm
I understand growing those patience muscles. I read an article recently, if I find it soon, I will send you a link. It talked about why a person with dementia may ask the same question a million times; beyond the fact that they may have forgotten they asked. But said that they may have a discomfort about what is going on. That they may not be asking because they actually “forgot” but because they have an unease.The article suggested, if you give an answer like, “Not for a while yet, I will let you know when it’s time to get ready.” or something a long those lines it might lessen their unease.
August 20, 2014 at 9:37 pm
Here is the link I was talking about. Feel free to delete it if you wish. http://frangipanisingaporenicum.wordpress.com/2014/07/25/communicating-with-the-person-with-dementia/
August 20, 2014 at 9:46 pm
I totally agree with this– though sometimes it does not help with the memory issue at all! I have been using this lately when Mom is clearly expressing anxieties, which is often. Rather than answering the specific question, I have taken to saying things like cheerily saying that everyone is safe and sound, or something like that rather than specifics. It seems to work much better than getting into details that do not stick in her mind.